Gen Z: Ruth 3
1So Naomi, her mother-in-law, was like, "Yo, my daughter, I gotta help you find some chill so your life can be lit."
2And now, isn’t Boaz from our fam? You were vibing with his crew, right? He’s out here grinding on the barley tonight at the threshing floor.
3So freshen up, put on some drip, and head down to the floor; just don’t let him know you’re there until he’s done munching and sipping.
4When he lays down, peep where he’s at, then creep in, uncover his feet, and lay down next to him; he’ll hit you up with what’s next.
5She was like, "Bet, I’ll do whatever you say."
6So she went down to the floor and followed all her mother-in-law’s instructions, no cap.
7After Boaz had eaten and felt good, he lay down at the edge of the grain pile; she snuck in, uncovered his feet, and got cozy.
8Then, at midnight, the dude got spooked and turned around, and boom, there was a woman chilling at his feet.
9He was like, "Who are you?" And she replied, "I’m Ruth, your girl. Spread your skirt over me, since you’re family."
10And he said, "You’re blessed by the Lord, my daughter, for you’ve shown way more kindness now than before. You didn’t go for the young bucks, whether they were broke or ballin’."
11"So now, my daughter, don’t sweat it; I’ll do everything you need. Everyone in the city knows you’re a total queen."
12"It’s true I’m your fam, but there’s someone closer than me."
13"Chill here tonight, and in the morning, if he’s down to do his part as family, cool; let him handle that. But if not, I got you, as the Lord lives; just stay put till morning."
14She stayed at his feet until morning, getting up before anyone noticed. He said, "Don’t let it be known a woman came to the floor."
15He was like, "Grab your shawl and hold it out." When she did, he filled it with six measures of barley and gave it to her, and she headed back to the city.
16When she got back to her mother-in-law, she was like, "Who are you, my daughter?" And Ruth told her everything that went down.
17Ruth said, "He gave me these six measures of barley and said, ‘Don’t head back to your mother-in-law empty-handed.’"
18Then Naomi said, "Just chill, my daughter, until you see how this plays out; the man won’t rest until he sorts this out today."