Gen Z: John 9
1As Jesus rolled by, he spotted a dude who was blind since day one.
2His squad was like, "Yo, Master, who messed up? This guy or his fam, that he’s blind?"
3Jesus was like, "Nah, neither did anything sus. It’s just to show off God’s works in him."
4"I gotta do the work of the one who sent me while it’s still light; night’s coming when no one can pop off."
5"While I’m in the game, I’m the light of the world, no cap."
6After saying this, he spit on the ground, made some mud, and rubbed it on the blind dude’s eyes.
7He told him, "Ayo, go wash in the pool of Siloam." The dude dipped, washed, and came back seeing.
8The neighbors were shook and were like, "Is this not the guy who used to sit and beg?"
9Some were like, "Yeah, that’s him," while others were like, "Nah, he just looks like him." But he was like, "I’m that dude."
10So they asked him, "How’d you get your sight back?"
11He answered, "Some dude named Jesus made mud, put it on my eyes, and told me to hit up the Siloam pool to wash. I did, and now I can see, no cap."
12They asked him, "Where’s this guy at?" He was like, "IDK."
13They brought the blind dude to the Pharisees.
14It was the Sabbath when Jesus made that mud and opened his eyes, savage move.
15The Pharisees asked him again how he could see. He said, "He put mud on my eyes, I washed, and now I see."
16Some Pharisees were like, "This dude can't be from God, he’s not vibing with the Sabbath." Others were like, "No way a sinner can pull off those miracles." So, they were lowkey divided.
17They asked the blind man again, "What do you think about him opening your eyes?" He said, "He’s a prophet, fr."
18But the Jews weren’t buying it, they didn’t believe he was blind until they called his parents.
19They asked the parents, "Is this your son, the one you said was born blind? How’s he seeing now?"
20His parents replied, "Yeah, this is our son, and he was definitely born blind."
21We don’t even know how he sees now, or who hooked him up with sight; he’s grown, so just ask him; he can speak for himself, no cap.
22His parents said this 'cause they were shook by the Jews: they already agreed that if anyone said he was the Christ, they’d be kicked out of the squad.
23So his parents were like, "He’s grown, just ask him."
24They called the blind dude again and told him to give God the props: we know this guy's a sinner, fr.
25He was like, "I don’t know if he’s a sinner or not, but one thing’s for sure: I was blind, and now I see, periodt."
26They asked him again, "What did he do to you? How did he open your eyes?"
27He said, "I already told y’all, and you didn’t listen: why do you wanna hear it again? You tryna be his fans too?"
28Then they came at him, saying, "You’re his disciple; we’re Moses’ crew."
29We know God talked to Moses, but this dude? We have no clue where he’s from.
30The man was like, "This is wild; you don’t know where he’s from, but he opened my eyes? That’s lit!"
31So like, God doesn’t vibe with sinners, but if you’re out here worshipping and doing His will, He’s got your back, no cap.
32Since day one, nobody’s ever seen someone open the eyes of a blind dude, fr.
33If this guy wasn’t from God, he’d be flopping hard, periodt.
34They clapped back, saying, "You were born in sin, who are you to teach us?" And they kicked him out, savage.
35Jesus peeped that they kicked him out, found him, and asked, "Do you believe in the Son of God?"
36He was like, "Who’s that, Lord? I need to know so I can believe."
37Jesus replied, "You’ve seen Him, and it’s me who’s chatting with you."
38The dude said, "Lord, I believe," and he worshipped Him, lit.
39Jesus said, "I’m here to judge; those who can’t see will see, and those who see will go blind, no cap."
40Some Pharisees heard this and were like, "Are we blind too?"
41Jesus was like, "If y'all were blind, no cap, you wouldn't be trippin'. But now you say you see; so your vibes are still sus."