1So, Sarai, Abram’s wifey, was childless, but she had a handmaid, an Egyptian named Hagar.

2Sarai told Abram, "Yo, the Lord's got me on lockdown for kids. Go get with my girl Hagar, maybe she can pop out some babies for us." Abram was like, "Bet."

3After ten years in Canaan, Sarai gave Hagar to Abram as a wifey.

4He went in to Hagar, and she got pregnant; suddenly, Sarai was looking sus to her.

5Sarai told Abram, "This is all on you! I gave my maid to you, and now she thinks she’s all that. Lord, you gotta judge between us!"

6Abram was like, "Chill, your maid's your business; do what you wanna do." When Sarai got savage with her, Hagar dipped.

7Then the angel of the Lord found Hagar chilling by a water fountain in the desert.

8The angel asked, "Hagar, where you coming from and where you headed?" She replied, "I’m running away from Sarai."

9The angel said, "Go back to Sarai and keep it respectful."

10The angel added, "I’ll make your fam so big, you won’t even be able to count them. Lit."

11The angel of the Lord was like, "Yo, you’re pregnant, and you’re gonna name him Ishmael 'cause God heard your struggle. No cap."

12He’s gonna be a wild one, always ready to throw hands; everyone’s gonna be on that beef with him. He’ll chill with his fam, no doubt.

13She named God, saying, “You see me, for real?” She was like, "Did I just find someone who sees me?"

14So they called the well Beer-lahai-roi; it’s right between Kadesh and Bered, vibing there.

15Hagar had a son for Abram, and he named him Ishmael, periodt.

16Abram was 86 years old when Hagar dropped Ishmael. That's wild.

1Now Sarai Abram’s wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name was Hagar.

2And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the Lord hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.

3And Sarai Abram’s wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, and gave her to her husband Abram to be his wife.

4And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.

5And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong be upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the Lord judge between me and thee.

6But Abram said unto Sarai, Behold, thy maid is in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee. And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled from her face.

7And the angel of the Lord found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness, by the fountain in the way to Shur.

8And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s maid, whence camest thou? and whither wilt thou go? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress Sarai.

9And the angel of the Lord said unto her, Return to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her hands.

10And the angel of the Lord said unto her, I will multiply thy seed exceedingly, that it shall not be numbered for multitude.

11And the angel of the Lord said unto her, Behold, thou art with child, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael; because the Lord hath heard thy affliction.

12And he will be a wild man; his hand will be against every man, and every man’s hand against him; and he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren.

13And she called the name of the Lord that spake unto her, Thou God seest me: for she said, Have I also here looked after him that seeth me?

14Wherefore the well was called Beer–lahai–roi; behold, it is between Kadesh and Bered.

15And Hagar bare Abram a son: and Abram called his son’s name, which Hagar bare, Ishmael.

16And Abram was fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael to Abram.