Gen Z: Numbers 15
1Yo, God hit up Moses and said,
2"Tell the fam of Israel, when you roll into the land I’m giving you,
3you gotta make a fire offering to the Lord, like a burnt offering or a sacrifice for your vows, or just a chill freewill offering during your feasts, to vibe sweet for the Lord, from your herd or flock."
4"When you offer to the Lord, bring a meat offering, like a tenth deal of flour mixed with a fourth of an hin of oil."
5"And for a drink offering, you’ll prep a fourth of an hin of wine with the burnt offering or sacrifice, for one lamb."
6"If you’re offering a ram, then you’ll need two tenth deals of flour mixed with a third of an hin of oil."
7"And for a drink offering, you’ll pour a third of an hin of wine, for that sweet vibe to the Lord."
8"When you get ready for a bull for a burnt offering or a sacrifice for your vows or peace offerings to the Lord,"
9"then bring a meat offering of three tenth deals of flour mixed with half an hin of oil."
10"And for your drink offering, bring half an hin of wine, for that fire offering that’s lit for the Lord."
11So, like, do this for one bull, one ram, or a lamb, or a kid. Vibes.
12Whatever number you prep, that’s how you roll with each one. No cap.
13Everyone born in the land gotta do this when they offer fire gifts to the Lord, it’s gotta smell sweet. Periodt.
14If a stranger chillin’ with you wants to offer fire gifts to the Lord, they gotta do it like you do. Bet.
15One rule for you and the stranger vibing with you, forever in your fam: as you are, so the stranger is before the Lord.
16One law and one way for you and the stranger vibing with you.
17And the Lord hit up Moses, saying,
18Tell the kids of Israel, when you roll into the land I’m bringing you,
19When you munch on the bread from the land, you gotta offer a heave gift to the Lord.
20You gotta offer a cake from the first of your dough as a heave gift: just like you do with the threshingfloor, that’s how you heave it.
21When you make bread, don’t forget to give the first bit to the Lord, that’s just the vibe for your fam.
22If you mess up and don’t follow all these rules God dropped on Moses, no cap.
23Everything God told you through Moses since day one and moving forward, keep that in mind, fam.
24If you accidentally mess up and didn’t know, the whole squad needs to bring a young bull for a fire offering, it’s gotta be a sweet vibe for the Lord, plus some meat and drink offerings, and a goat for the sin offering.
25The priest will handle the atonement for the whole crew of Israel, and it’ll be forgiven; it’s all good since it was an accident. Bring that fire sacrifice to the Lord for your slip-up.
26The whole squad of Israel and any outsiders chilling with them will be forgiven since everyone was in the dark.
27If anyone sins without knowing, they gotta bring a young she-goat as a sin offering, periodt.
28The priest will make it right for the person who didn’t know they were sinning, and it’ll be forgiven, no stress.
29You gotta have the same rules for anyone who sins by accident, whether they’re born in Israel or just passing through.
30But if someone does something on purpose, whether they’re local or a stranger, that’s just sus, and they’ll be cut off from the crew.
31If you straight up ignore the Lord's word and break His rules, you're cut off, no cap; your sins are on you.
32While the Israelites were chilling in the wilderness, they found a dude picking up sticks on the Sabbath.
33The peeps who found him gathering sticks brought him to Moses, Aaron, and the whole squad.
34They put him in time-out 'cause they didn’t know what to do with him yet.
35Then the Lord told Moses, "That guy's gotta go: the whole crew needs to stone him outside the camp."
36So they took him outside and stoned him like the Lord told Moses, and dude didn’t make it.
37The Lord hit up Moses and said,
38"Tell the Israelites to make fringes on the edges of their clothes for all their generations, and put a blue ribbon on those fringes."
39This will be your fringe so you can look at it and remember all the Lord’s commands and actually do them; don’t chase after your own vibes and what your eyes want.
40Remember to keep all my commands and stay holy for your God.
41I’m the Lord your God, who pulled you outta Egypt to be your vibe check: I’m the Lord your God, no cap.