1So, like, a minute later, God gave Israel a chill pill from all their haters, and Joshua got old, no cap.

2Joshua gathered all of Israel, the elders, the heads, and the squad, and was like, "I’m old, fr."

3You’ve seen all the wild stuff God did for you against all these nations; He’s the one who’s been fighting your battles, periodt.

4Check it, I’ve split up these nations left for you to inherit, from the Jordan to the big sea, all the ones I cut off.

5And your God’s gonna kick them outta your way, so you can take their land, just like He promised, bet.

6So be super brave to stick to everything in Moses' law, don’t stray left or right, it’s lit.

7Don’t hang out with these nations still chillin' with you; don’t even say their gods’ names or vibe with them, no cap.

8But stick with the Lord your God, just like you’ve been doing, for real.

9God has already sent away big, strong nations from you; no one’s been able to stand against you yet, fr.

10One of you can chase a thousand, ‘cause your God is the one fighting for you, just like He said.

11So keep it 100 and love the Lord your God, for real.

12But if you decide to slide back and chill with the leftovers of these nations, marrying and mingling, that’s sus.

13Know this for sure: God won’t drive out any more of these nations; they’ll be traps and thorns until you’re donezo from this good land He gave you.

14And, like, today I’m going the way of all the earth; you know in your hearts that everything good God promised you came true, no doubt.

15So just like all the good stuff happened, if you mess up, the Lord will bring bad vibes until you’re gone from this good land He gave you.

16When you break the covenant with your God by serving other gods and bowing to them, His anger will flare up, and you’ll be outta this good land quick.

1And it came to pass a long time after that the Lord had given rest unto Israel from all their enemies round about, that Joshua waxed old and stricken in age.

2And Joshua called for all Israel, and for their elders, and for their heads, and for their judges, and for their officers, and said unto them, I am old and stricken in age:

3And ye have seen all that the Lord your God hath done unto all these nations because of you; for the Lord your God is he that hath fought for you.

4Behold, I have divided unto you by lot these nations that remain, to be an inheritance for your tribes, from Jordan, with all the nations that I have cut off, even unto the great sea westward.

5And the Lord your God, he shall expel them from before you, and drive them from out of your sight; and ye shall possess their land, as the Lord your God hath promised unto you.

6Be ye therefore very courageous to keep and to do all that is written in the book of the law of Moses, that ye turn not aside therefrom to the right hand or to the left;

7That ye come not among these nations, these that remain among you; neither make mention of the name of their gods, nor cause to swear by them, neither serve them, nor bow yourselves unto them:

8But cleave unto the Lord your God, as ye have done unto this day.

9For the Lord hath driven out from before you great nations and strong: but as for you, no man hath been able to stand before you unto this day.

10One man of you shall chase a thousand: for the Lord your God, he it is that fighteth for you, as he hath promised you.

11Take good heed therefore unto yourselves, that ye love the Lord your God.

12Else if ye do in any wise go back, and cleave unto the remnant of these nations, even these that remain among you, and shall make marriages with them, and go in unto them, and they to you:

13Know for a certainty that the Lord your God will no more drive out any of these nations from before you; but they shall be snares and traps unto you, and scourges in your sides, and thorns in your eyes, until ye perish from off this good land which the Lord your God hath given you.

14And, behold, this day I am going the way of all the earth: and ye know in all your hearts and in all your souls, that not one thing hath failed of all the good things which the Lord your God spake concerning you; all are come to pass unto you, and not one thing hath failed thereof.

15Therefore it shall come to pass, that as all good things are come upon you, which the Lord your God promised you; so shall the Lord bring upon you all evil things, until he have destroyed you from off this good land which the Lord your God hath given you.

16When ye have transgressed the covenant of the Lord your God, which he commanded you, and have gone and served other gods, and bowed yourselves to them; then shall the anger of the Lord be kindled against you, and ye shall perish quickly from off the good land which he hath given unto you.