1Adam and Eve had a whole vibe going on, and she popped out Cain, saying, "I just got a whole dude from God. Lit!"

2Then she had Abel too. Abel was out here vibing with the sheep, while Cain was grinding on the fields.

3Time passed, and Cain brought some produce as a gift to God.

4Abel also brought the best of his flock, and God was totally vibing with Abel's offering.

5But God wasn’t feeling Cain's offering at all. Cain got super mad and his mood just dropped.

6God asked Cain, "Why you mad? Why you looking so down?"

7"If you do good, won't you be accepted? But if not, sin’s just waiting to pounce, and you gotta keep it in check."

8Cain chatted with Abel in the fields, then he straight up turned on him and took him out.

9God asked Cain, "Yo, where's your brother Abel?" Cain was like, "I dunno, am I supposed to keep track of him?"

10God said, "What did you just do? Your brother's blood is crying out to me from the ground."

11Yo, now you’re cursed from the ground, which just opened up to sip on your bro’s blood. Savage move.

12When you try to farm, it won’t give you any strength; you’re gonna be a total wanderer on this earth.

13Cain was like, “God, this punishment is way too much for me to handle, fr.”

14Look, you’ve kicked me off the earth today; I’ll be hidden from you, and everyone who finds me is gonna want to take me out.

15God said, “Anyone who takes you out, I’ll make them pay seven times harder.” Then He marked Cain so nobody would mess with him.

16Cain dipped from God’s presence and settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden.

17Cain got with his wife, and she got pregnant, had Enoch, and he built a city named after his son. That’s lit.

18Enoch had Irad; then Irad had Mehujael; Mehujael had Methusael; and Methusael had Lamech.

19Lamech was like, “Two wives? Bet.” One was Adah, and the other was Zillah.

20Adah had Jabal; he was the OG for those who live in tents and own cattle.

21His bro's name was Jubal, the OG of all who vibes with the harp and organ.

22Zillah also had Tubal-cain, the rizz master of crafting with brass and iron; plus, he had a sis named Naamah.

23Lamech was like, "Yo, Adah and Zillah, listen up! I straight up took a dude out, and it hurt, fr."

24If Cain gets revenge seven times, Lamech's on a whole other level with seventy-seven times, no cap.

25Adam hit it again with his wife, and they had a son named Seth, 'cause she was like, "God gave me another chance after Abel got taken out."

26Seth had a son too, named Enos, and that's when people started calling on the Lord, periodt.

1And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord.

2And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.

3And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the Lord.

4And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the Lord had respect unto Abel and to his offering:

5But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.

6And the Lord said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?

7If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee shall be his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.

8And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.

9And the Lord said unto Cain, Where is Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: Am I my brother’s keeper?

10And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.

11And now art thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand;

12When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.

13And Cain said unto the Lord, My punishment is greater than I can bear.

14Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, that every one that findeth me shall slay me.

15And the Lord said unto him, Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the Lord set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.

16And Cain went out from the presence of the Lord, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.

17And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.

18And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech.

19And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one was Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.

20And Adah bare Jabal: he was the father of such as dwell in tents, and of such as have cattle.

21And his brother’s name was Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ.

22And Zillah, she also bare Tubal–cain, an instructer of every artificer in brass and iron: and the sister of Tubal–cain was Naamah.

23And Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah, Hear my voice; ye wives of Lamech, hearken unto my speech: for I have slain a man to my wounding, and a young man to my hurt.

24If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.

25And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, said she, hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew.

26And to Seth, to him also there was born a son; and he called his name Enos: then began men to call upon the name of the Lord.