1Rehoboam pulled up to Shechem, 'cause all of Israel was there to crown him king. Vibes.

2So, Jeroboam, the dude who bounced to Egypt, caught wind of this (he was dodging king Solomon, no cap).

3They hit him up and called him over. Jeroboam and the whole crew of Israel showed up, talking to Rehoboam like,

4"Your dad made our lives a whole vibe check. So, make it easier on us, and we’ll be your ride or die."

5He was like, "Aight, give me three days to think, then come back." And the squad dipped.

6King Rehoboam hit up the OGs who used to roll with Solomon, asking, "What’s the move to deal with these peeps?"

7They told him, "If you vibe with these people today and serve them right, they’ll be your loyal squad forever."

8But he ghosted their advice and asked the young homies he grew up with instead.

9He asked them, "What’s the game plan to answer these folks who want an easier yoke from my pops?"

10The young crew told him, "Just tell them, ‘My pinky’s gonna be thicker than my dad’s whole vibe.’"

11So my dad put you through a lot, but I’m about to make it even tougher. He used whips, but I’m coming at you with scorpions, no cap.

12Jeroboam and the squad rolled up to Rehoboam on the third day, just like the king said, asking to chat again.

13The king hit back at the people harshly and totally ignored the old heads’ advice.

14He listened to the young bucks instead, saying, “My dad made your lives hard, and I’m gonna make it harder. He used whips; I’m about to hit you with scorpions.”

15The king wasn’t about to listen to the people; this was all part of the Lord’s plan, just like He told Ahijah the Shilonite to tell Jeroboam, no lie.

16When all of Israel saw the king wasn’t vibing with them, they responded, “What do we even have with David? No inheritance with Jesse’s kid. Let’s bounce to our tents, Israel. You do you, David.”

17But the kids of Israel living in Judah still had Rehoboam as their king.

18Then King Rehoboam sent Adoram, the tribute guy, and all of Israel straight-up stoned him to death. So Rehoboam dipped to his chariot, trying to jet to Jerusalem.

19Israel was like, “Nah,” and rebelled against David’s house to this day.

20When all of Israel heard Jeroboam was back, they called him to the gathering and made him king over all Israel; only Judah stuck with David’s house, periodt.

21So Rehoboam rolls up to Jerusalem and gathers all the squad from Judah and Benjamin, like 180k warriors ready to pop off against Israel to get his kingdom back.

22But then God slid into Shemaiah's DMs with a message.

23God was like, "Yo, tell Rehoboam, king of Judah, and all the fam from Judah and Benjamin, plus the leftovers, this."

24The Lord said, "Don't go fight your bros, the Israelites. Just chill at home; this is my plan." They listened and bounced back home, no cap.

25Then Jeroboam built Shechem in Ephraim and set up shop there; he also built Penuel after that.

26Jeroboam was thinking, "For real, the kingdom's gonna slide back to David's crew."

27"If these peeps head over to sacrifice at the Lord's house in Jerusalem, they'll vibe back with Rehoboam, and I'm toast."

28So the king hit up some advice and made two gold calves, saying, "Chill, it's too much to trek to Jerusalem; check out your gods, Israel, who brought you outta Egypt."

29He placed one in Beth-el and the other in Dan.

30And this became a whole mess, 'cause the people started worshipping the one in Dan.

31He built a chill spot for worship and got some priests from the low-key crew, not even from Levi’s fam.

32Jeroboam threw a feast in the eighth month, on the fifteenth day, kinda like the one in Judah, and he made some offerings on the altar. He did the same in Beth-el, sacrificing to the calves he made and put priests at the high places he set up.

33So, he offered on the altar he made in Beth-el on the fifteenth of the eighth month, the month he thought up himself; and he threw a feast for the Israelites, burning incense on the altar.

1And Rehoboam went to Shechem: for all Israel were come to Shechem to make him king.

2And it came to pass, when Jeroboam the son of Nebat, who was yet in Egypt, heard of it, (for he was fled from the presence of king Solomon, and Jeroboam dwelt in Egypt;)

3That they sent and called him. And Jeroboam and all the congregation of Israel came, and spake unto Rehoboam, saying,

4Thy father made our yoke grievous: now therefore make thou the grievous service of thy father, and his heavy yoke which he put upon us, lighter, and we will serve thee.

5And he said unto them, Depart yet for three days, then come again to me. And the people departed.

6And king Rehoboam consulted with the old men, that stood before Solomon his father while he yet lived, and said, How do ye advise that I may answer this people?

7And they spake unto him, saying, If thou wilt be a servant unto this people this day, and wilt serve them, and answer them, and speak good words to them, then they will be thy servants for ever.

8But he forsook the counsel of the old men, which they had given him, and consulted with the young men that were grown up with him, and which stood before him:

9And he said unto them, What counsel give ye that we may answer this people, who have spoken to me, saying, Make the yoke which thy father did put upon us lighter?

10And the young men that were grown up with him spake unto him, saying, Thus shalt thou speak unto this people that spake unto thee, saying, Thy father made our yoke heavy, but make thou it lighter unto us; thus shalt thou say unto them, My little finger shall be thicker than my father’s loins.

11And now whereas my father did lade you with a heavy yoke, I will add to your yoke: my father hath chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions.

12So Jeroboam and all the people came to Rehoboam the third day, as the king had appointed, saying, Come to me again the third day.

13And the king answered the people roughly, and forsook the old men’s counsel that they gave him;

14And spake to them after the counsel of the young men, saying, My father made your yoke heavy, and I will add to your yoke: my father also chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions.

15Wherefore the king hearkened not unto the people; for the cause was from the Lord, that he might perform his saying, which the Lord spake by Ahijah the Shilonite unto Jeroboam the son of Nebat.

16So when all Israel saw that the king hearkened not unto them, the people answered the king, saying, What portion have we in David? neither have we inheritance in the son of Jesse: to your tents, O Israel: now see to thine own house, David. So Israel departed unto their tents.

17But as for the children of Israel which dwelt in the cities of Judah, Rehoboam reigned over them.

18Then king Rehoboam sent Adoram, who was over the tribute; and all Israel stoned him with stones, that he died. Therefore king Rehoboam made speed to get him up to his chariot, to flee to Jerusalem.

19So Israel rebelled against the house of David unto this day.

20And it came to pass, when all Israel heard that Jeroboam was come again, that they sent and called him unto the congregation, and made him king over all Israel: there was none that followed the house of David, but the tribe of Judah only.

21And when Rehoboam was come to Jerusalem, he assembled all the house of Judah, with the tribe of Benjamin, an hundred and fourscore thousand chosen men, which were warriors, to fight against the house of Israel, to bring the kingdom again to Rehoboam the son of Solomon.

22But the word of God came unto Shemaiah the man of God, saying,

23Speak unto Rehoboam, the son of Solomon, king of Judah, and unto all the house of Judah and Benjamin, and to the remnant of the people, saying,

24Thus saith the Lord, Ye shall not go up, nor fight against your brethren the children of Israel: return every man to his house; for this thing is from me. They hearkened therefore to the word of the Lord, and returned to depart, according to the word of the Lord.

25Then Jeroboam built Shechem in mount Ephraim, and dwelt therein; and went out from thence, and built Penuel.

26And Jeroboam said in his heart, Now shall the kingdom return to the house of David:

27If this people go up to do sacrifice in the house of the Lord at Jerusalem, then shall the heart of this people turn again unto their lord, even unto Rehoboam king of Judah, and they shall kill me, and go again to Rehoboam king of Judah.

28Whereupon the king took counsel, and made two calves of gold, and said unto them, It is too much for you to go up to Jerusalem: behold thy gods, O Israel, which brought thee up out of the land of Egypt.

29And he set the one in Beth–el, and the other put he in Dan.

30And this thing became a sin: for the people went to worship before the one, even unto Dan.

31And he made an house of high places, and made priests of the lowest of the people, which were not of the sons of Levi.

32And Jeroboam ordained a feast in the eighth month, on the fifteenth day of the month, like unto the feast that is in Judah, and he offered upon the altar. So did he in Beth–el, sacrificing unto the calves that he had made: and he placed in Beth–el the priests of the high places which he had made.

33So he offered upon the altar which he had made in Beth–el the fifteenth day of the eighth month, even in the month which he had devised of his own heart; and ordained a feast unto the children of Israel: and he offered upon the altar, and burnt incense.